11th January 2017
I promised myself that I’d find a solicitor. And I have. It’s just taken me longer than I thought it would. The first one I called wasn’t my cup of tea and then end of term meant that I put off looking again.
But another night waiting in for James was enough. I bit the bullet and found a really pleasant and knowledgeable lawyer to talk to at SA Law. We spent 20 minutes on the phone last week discussing the practical timeline of a typical divorce. She seemed to understand what I needed to know and “got” my concerns about the impact on the children, so I took the next step and yesterday I met with Marilyn. She metaphorically held my hand as she explained more about divorce and the emotional process that I will go through. Talking it over face-to-face has shown me that I just can’t remove the emotion from all this. There is going to be change. People are going to be hurt. This isn’t going to be as straightforward as I want it to be but I can try to make it as painless for my children as possible. I don’t want to drag James through the mud either, we just can’t be together any longer.
If I’m honest the thought of having to sell the house is what’s worrying me the most. I just didn’t realise that it might come down to that and was shocked when this was mentioned. The children need stability and surely it’s enough for them to cope with James and I divorcing let alone having to move? And what happens if we do have to move? Can Lottie stay at her school?
I’ve got a lot to think about. I know what to expect; the decisions that I have to make and potential outcomes. It just feels so overwhelming at the moment and I must get this right – I don’t want to fall out with James nor for him to lose his relationship with the children. I need time to think this through properly.